This weekend, Sofiia and I are going to Odesa for my birthday. We’ve both been really looking forward to it. She’s spent the last week preparing her outfits. The hardest part has been negotiating the wardrobe. She and I, shall we say, have slightly different tastes.
Warm colors are not welcome here.
For instance, a couple weeks ago when I came to her place for us to go to a barbecue on the river, I wore my red swim shorts and my Hawaiian shirt with all the local brews of Maui.
She cried.
“I’m not going out with you like that,” she sobbed.
“Are you kidding me?” I asked.
“No. It is so cringe. YOU are so cringe!” Sofiia exclaimed.
“I mean I’ve literally worn this shirt before with you,” I shrugged.
“I don’t care. Can’t you change?” She asked.
“You said we’re already running late,” I told her.
She sobbed in recognition of this fact.
“Are you serious?” I exasperated.
“How are we supposed to go to Odesa?” She cried.
“That’s such a stretch,” I laughed.
“I’m not going with you looking like that!” She insisted.
“Are you really gonna do this right now?” I asked.
Sofiia pouted.
Eventually I convinced her to go outside, and the rest is history. The funny thing is all the guys at the barbecue were similarly dressed to me.
But Odesa will be fun. Hopefully we don’t get killed by a mine or missile or drone, or get a really bad sunburn. My lady is very sensitive to sunlight, being a European vampire. I’ll finally get to swim in the Black Sea. It’ll be my first time swimming in a sea that’s in a war-zone. I’ve done the river. Now I need the sea.
We’re leaving Kharkiv Thursday night on a 16-hour train ride to Odesa. We’ll arrive around noon Friday. My birthday is Sunday. So it’ll be fun!
I’m sure there’ll be lots of spicy drama, maybe some inspiration for more blog posts!
Hopefully no one dies.
And if I die, 9-times-outta-10 it was Sofiia with a knife in the kitchen!!!
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